Radiation transforms me into a glowing mutant

Fun fact: wind and sea spray aboard a speeding catamaran will disguise the effect of tropical sun on flesh – even on an overcast day! Just a reminder, in case you ever ride the water taxi between, say, Koh Tao and Koh Phangan.

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I am taking a break from budget guest houses for a few days to “splurge” at a couple of the mid-market Thai island resorts. The first one, Sensei Paradise Resort, on Koh Tao, used to be a budget joint but then struck on a brilliant positioning: rustic chic.

So, the huts are still dark and relatively primitive – cold-water showers, barely any lighting, but comfy king-size beds – but a sensational private beach, superb kitchen and open-air dining/reception area that attract the well-heeled leisure class.

I stumble in, sweaty and disheveled, seeking directions to something-or-other, and get snooted; in retaliation, I book the last room available, just ahead of a beautiful couple, also walk-ins, who are clearly “their kind of people.” It sets me back all of eighty bucks, but it’s worth it to feel like Columbo vexing and appalling everyone at the fancy place.

The next day I water-taxi over to Koh Phangan hoping to follow train-mate Chef Lee’s advice: “Go to the Bamboo Hut, talk to Mr. T. and tell him I sent you; he’ll fix you up.” Not that easy: waiting at every arriving boat is a gauntlet of touts pushing brochures into your hand, chatting you up, sniffing out the inexperienced, the clueless, the me.

Charlie brings me down like a cheetah dropping the herd’s lamest gazelle.

But it turns out o.k. because Charlie is touting for a brand-new resort on a decent stretch of beach. For $40 bucks a night, I feel that I am getting a pretty decent value. What do you think?




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I use this respite to locate Lee’s buddy’s place on a map, way the heck over on the far side of Koh Phangan. No roads, accessible only by boat. Possibly no electricity and certainly no Internet. Hmm …